Major and Minor Arcana

Minnie was pacing. I guess if you needed a barometer to measure the level of tension in the place, the usually calm Minnie was an indicator of the level of restlessness in the house. Diantha was, on the other hand, calm, playing jacks on the floor of the living room, seeming unperturbed. Renee and I were washing dishes. Never mind we had a state of the art dish washer which could do everything including launch a man into space. We had to do something to keep our hands busy. Otherwise we would be bouncing off the walls. 

Aolani was playing a card game with tarot cards. Jessica was frowning at her hand. “Tell me again Aolani what makes a book and what makes a turn,” she said.

“A book is the minor arcana, in the same suit in numerical order in sets of three. The royal cards are Aces, Kings, Queens, Knights and pages and the turns are major arcana and they are just in numerical order,” she said.

“Ah, okay,” she said, frowning at her hand. Barrister came and stood behind her and looked at her cards and pointed out the most valuable cards and indicated the throw away cards. The game was a marriage of poker and rummy. She looked up at him. “Thanks sweety.”

“Anytime,” he said. The door banged open and we all turned. It was Alcide and Len. We slumped down.

“Wow, talk about a warm reception,” said Alcide, sitting down at the table.

“I would not sit down there if I was you Alcide, Aolani could get a full house and kill someone at the table,” I said.

“Really?” asked Jessica.

“No, not really, at least not the part about the full house. I think you have to have a baby straight,” she said. Smart assed witches, what more could you expect. The door opened again and in stepped Pam. 

“Damn it,” she swore. She was staring at her phone.

“What’s up Pam? Any word from Eric and Bill?” asked Aolani.

“No,” she said. “What can I do to get that fucking fairy princess away from me?”

“Uh, take Tara off her hands, or whatever is left of her,” I said.

“Shit,” she said. Pam flopped uncharacteristically down on the couch. She stared at the ceiling.

“I don’t understand why she turned Tara into a Vampire anyhow,” said Alcide.

“As unimpressed as I am with Sookie, I don’t understand why you are so mad at her,” I said. “You abjured Debbie Pelt and pissed her off anyhow and she went gunning for Sookie. She was just lucky enough to get the gun and shoot her. Debbie is the reason Lafayette made the decision, bad as it was, to have Pam turn her.” Alcide growled at me and Barrister stood behind me, his hands on my shoulder.  Diantha snickered and bounced her jacks ball in the air and swept up all her jacks.

“Pam, are you gonna save Tara?” asked Minnie.

“Fuck Tara,” she said, her voice was leaden.

“But…Eric would not approve of that,” said Minnie. “You know he wouldn’t.”

“Don’t you dare speak to me of what my maker would and would not do,” she said.

“And you be nice or you go home,” I said. “Vampires are a bunch of prima donnas in my book.”

“Who cares what’s in your book,” she muttered.

“That’s it, out you go til you can be nice,” I said. I pointed at her and muttered a repelling spell and Pam got up and barged out of the house. I locked the door and set the silver bolt and sat down. “Come on, we can still have a meeting.”

Aolani and Jess put their cards down and Minnie and Renee and Alcide and Barrister and Len and Diantha and I began our meeting.

“Bill and Eric will be home in Louisiana this Sunday,” I said. “So we need to get all the info we can on these sanguinistas.”

“Is Steve Newlin a sanguinista?” asked Len.

“Maybe, we think so,” I said. “And we have to consider Lilith.”

“Do you think she is alive?” asked Jessica.

“I don’t know. I mean, they used her blood to turn Dracula Vampire. Maybe they have a way of resurrecting her or maybe she isn’t definitely dead, maybe she has never died and they are…I don’t know, just taking care of her. Maybe she is feeble somehow,” said Aolani. “Who is Roman really, how old is he?”

“Well, he is pretty old. Maybe the same age of Godric, give or take a decade. Not as old as Russell Edgington,” said Barrister.

“When do you think he will be well enough to rise?” asked Renee. “Do you think it will be soon?” There was a pounding at the door seconds after Len got a text on his phone.

“It’s Pam, and I quote, ‘I will be fucking nice’,” he said.

“Go let her in Alcide,” I said. He got up and went and threw the silver bolt and slid the door back. Pam came in and sat down. “Pam, how long before Russell can rise?”

“No one knows. I know of only one Vampire starved and bound for that long and it took him a while. But he was a young Vampire, not quite five, so it took more out of him,” said Pam.

“So sooner rather than later for Russell?” asked Renee.

“Yes,” she said.

“So, we knew about Lorena and Bill and their bad habits,” I said. “And we see one of the versions of your being made.”

“Well, don’t believe everything you see,” she said. “But Eric did tell me about the responsibilities of a maker and how he felt about being a maker. As you can see, Eric takes the position very seriously and has little time for a maker who doesn’t.”

“And that is why Eric is such a great maker,” said Barrister.

“Bill tries,” said Jessica, taking up for her maker.

“He does, Jess,” I said. “I have to admit, he tries really hard.”

“So what can we do for Terry and Arlene?” asked Alcide.

“Not a whole hell of a lot,” said Len. “We don’t even know the story here, so we are best just observing.”

“Can’t be good,” said Minnie. “Arlene is not very supportive.”

“In a way, I get it, but in a way, she needs to understand a little better,” I said.

“But she has progeny, so she has to think of it first,” said Pam. Pam generally could give a shit less about humans and their reproduction and off spring, so this statement was tad odd coming from her.

“That does make a difference,” I said. “Jessica, did you enjoy your chase?”

“Saw that huh?” she asked.

“Yeah, you need to be careful running after stuff you don’t know much about,” said Aolani. “You never know what you are chasing. It could be a fluffy bunny or it could be a dragon.”

“I see what you mean,” said Jessica. “And then Jason was all sad.”

“It’s not Sookie’s bruge you should be worried about,” said Pam.

“How do you mean, Pam,” she asked.

“Let’s just say you are leaving a trail of broken hearts in your wake, one of them is courting death, literally,” said Pam.

“Hoyt?” she said. Pam nodded once and Jessica shook her head.

“That’s so fucking stupid,” said Jessica. “Call me the next time you see him.”

“I’ll add that to my to do list,” she snapped.

“So are you going to take charge of Tara?” asked Minnie.

“I will do whatever I can to help her,” said Pam.

“I guess that is the best we can ask,” said Renee. “Is there anything we can do to get ready for Eric and Bill to come home, if they come home next Sunday?”

“Just be here for them and try to help them think their way through. Len, is there some way we can do something about those bands they have put on them?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” said Len. “I will call some people about it. Maybe there is a way to corrupt the signal by hacking the app.”

“Well, we will have to figure out a way to test it, and I agree with the tech geek, the boys are too cute to be goo,” I said.

“I’ll see what we can do,” he promised.

“Now, this thing with Lafayette, he needs serious help,” said Renee.

“Yeah,” I said. “Aolani?”

“Well, it may that once he was possessed by Jesus family familiar, it stayed with him when Jesus died. I would say Lafayette may need to reach out either to Jesus or reach out to Jesus grandfather,” said Aolani.

“Lafayette may not care for that,” said Minnie.

“He may not have any choice,” said Aolani.

“That’s all we know Pam, so tell us, who would free Russell Edgington, only the four of you knew where Russell was buried,” I said.

“I don’t know,” she said.

“Well, you better be thinking that question over, because you are going to be quizzed about that very thing, real soon,” said Barrister.

Without Any Authority

Pam was still troubled and sullen. I did appreciate the fact Tara was no longer here, and it was unlikely she was going to be here for a while. Somehow, I didn’t know what was going to be worse, having Pam here the way she is, or having Tara here, which really, didn’t surprise me how she was when she was turned. I sat down next to the Vampire. I didn’t offer to touch her. She wouldn’t like it and the last thing I wanted to do was die at her hands.

Renee and Aolani were talking to Alcide in low voices. “What are they saying Pam?” I asked.
“Alcide is in some sort of trouble with that pack here in Shreveport,” she said.
“Yeah, he’s got heavy duty troubles,” I said. “Still no word from Eric?” She shook her head.
“I don’t want to talk about it if you please,” she said, sniffing. It was such an odd thing for her to do since she did not breathe and I was unaware it would do anything for impending tears in the Vampire race. I nodded.

I missed those boys. I hated to see the Authority torturing them and man handling them. I hated the pained look on Eric’s face when he thought Nora was dead, and I hated the way Bill’s face twisted in agony when they shot the colloidal silver into his veins.

Minnie came over and brought Pam a Tru:Blood. She took it and thanked her. Minnie sat down and waited. Jessica was on her way. Jesus, that was going to become an absolute mess. In a hurry. Diantha came over. The little demon was sleeping in Bill’s room. I would rather she slept on the couch, but I reckoned she would soon be doing that very thing when Bill got back. If he got back. I had nasty dreams of Bill and Eric being staked. It was a close thing. Renee and Aolani and Alcide and Len and Barrister came and sat down.

“What are we waiting for?” asked Pam.
“Jessica,” said Barrister. “I just phoned and she says she is on the way.”
Jessica finally breezed in and sat down. She looked worried.
“Pam, who are the Sanguinista’s?” asked Aolani.
“They are the backward thinking Vampires who think you people are cattle,” said Pam.
“Anything else more specific?” asked Renee.
“And they take the Vampire Bible, the Original Testament, literally” she said.
“Vampire Bible?” asked Len.
“Yes, it’s pretty strange and I don’t believe in it, but it says God is a Vampire and Lilith is the first creation and she is a Vampire, it’s supposed to be our origin story,” she said. “But like all religions you have the more relaxed interpretation and then you have the more fundie believers. They are crazy.”
“Man, I hate religion stuff,” said Jessica.

“What do you think of Steve Newlin?” asked Barrister. “Do you have a feeling of him?”
“He’s a dick,” said Jessica. “He said Bill wasn’t the king anymore, what the fuck does that mean?”
“I don’t know,” lied Renee. “But you better be real careful with him.”
“So, what are you going to do with Tara, Pam?” asked Minnie. “Can’t you help her?”
“Fucking Sookie,” she spat.
“Hey, you didn’t have to turn her,” said Alcide. “You could have left her be and Sookie and Lafayette would have gotten over it.”
“Now what the hell are you going to do Alcide?” asked Diantha. “Are you gonna take these weres to task?”
“I am having nothing to do with the pack,” said Alcide.
“I don’t think you have a choice,” said Len. “It isn’t ever good to have a group of wolves without an alpha.”
“Then you take it over, Len, don’t give a fuck,” he growled.
“Hey, settle down, don’t raise your hackles at Len,” said Aolani tersely.
“Sorry,” he said.
“Yeah, well what about Luna?” asked Renee. “Looks as though Emma is a werewolf.”
“Then nothing will stop Martha and the pack from claiming her,” said Alcide.
“You have to help her,” said Renee.
“There is not a lot I can do,” he said. “It would take me getting involved with the pack and I don’t want to be involved with the pack.”
“Wantin’ ain’t gettin’,” I said. “You are involved in this whether you want to be or not.”

“Boy, Jason is feeling the wages of sin,” said Diantha.
“Yeah, he’s getting karma back in spades,” said Aolani. “Andy was funny…’Stackhouse, I had sex,’ “
“Yeah, ‘Join the club’,” I said. “Kudos to you though Jess for not selling Jason to Steve Newlin. Smarmy little thing. Jessica, I recommend you drive a stake into him.”

“I would, but I need to know what he meant by Bill not being the King. Is he not the King?” she asked.
“He may not be, but right now, we need Bill and Eric focused on helping each other, though I think they are doing an admirable job of it,” said Minnie. “What about Nora, what do you think will happen to her?”
“I don’t know, hopefully she will be able to get out, but I don’t know,” I said.
“Pam, what do you think, what are her odds?” asked Aolani.

“I don’t know,” she said. “I don’t care except it effects Eric’s survival.”
“Pam, things will get better,” said Minnie.
“I have never been so…estranged from Eric. It is like I have lost a part of my body. It’s a deep pain I can’t soothe,” said Pam.
“Oh Pam,” I said.
“Don’t you fucking dare, don’t you fucking pity me,” she said. I opened my mouth to deny it and then I stopped, that is exactly what I was doing.
“Well, if I can’t pity you, then I will get mad with you,” I said. “Find out everything you can about the Sanguinistas for us. I mean even Bill doesn’t seem to know who they are.”
“I’ll see what I can discover,” she said. “Anything for Eric.”

“I felt sorry for Lafayette,” said Barrister. “Poor bloke, losing his family that way, and now having his cousin Tara that way.”
“Yeah, that is terrible,” I said. “I wonder why Jesus has not made an appearance, or some other helpful ghost?”
“Lafayette is really operating on automatic, he can do what he does, but he doesn’t know how he has this gift or how to access that world,” said Aolani.
“Yeah, he needs some intervention,” said Minnie. Pam stood up.

“I have to go, I can’t stand to just sit here, I have to go to Fangtasia,” and she was gone.

“Poor thing,” said Len. “We need to put Eric and Pam in the same room together and let them work it out.”
“It’ll be the cage match of the year,” I said. “Eric and Pam duking it out, both being stubborn and hard headed and strong willed. We humans are always astounded with the connections we see them make to one another. Look at Eric and Godric, he had not seen Godric in a very long time and he still loved Godric. Even when he had amnesia, he still felt connected with him.”
“I miss Bill,” said Jessica.
“We do too,” said Renee, hugging the little Vampire.
“I even miss Eric,” she said.
“We do too, kinda,” said Renee.

Later that night, me and Aolani went outside in the back patio area where we had our grill and picnic table. We looked around and then began calling them: Here Ishee, come on buddy, Baby, bring your little fuzzy ass over here. Lafayette needs you.

Troubles...Yeah we got em

Moody Vampires are always subject to be irritating. Eric is famous for being moody and Bill is not only the King of Louisiana, he is the King of Moody Vampires. Pam was never known for sulking and the thing she had with her wearing Tara Thornton’s face was not pleasant to be around either. I was shocked when I came into the House and found Pam on the couch and Tara perched on the countertop like a vulture.

“God, she stinks of the earth she was buried in,” I said to Pam. “Why is she here?”

“I ordered her to come here,” she said. “I need your help.”

“You hold her, I’ll grab the stake,” I said. Tara looked at me.

“Fuck you bitch, fucking witches, fucking Vampires,” she cursed.

“Man, if you thought she hated herself and everyone else before, she really hates herself,” I walked past her and into the kitchen. “Tru:Blood Pam?”

“I had something before I came,” she said sullenly.

“Hear from Eric or Bill?” I asked. The first night of the summer adventures had been revealed and already I missed Bill and Eric, though for two different reasons. I missed Bill because he was my lover and I missed Eric because he was my friend.

“No,” she said. “Have you?”

“No,” I said. “Tara, you want a Tru:Blood?”

“Fuck you,” she spat.

“Alrighty then,” I said. “Wanna come off the counter? I am going to make some supper before our meeting and you have your nasty ass shoes on my clean work surface.”

“Tara, go perch somewhere else,” she ordered. Tara moved with Vamp speed to the stairs and perched on the banister of the stairs.

“Where is Barrister?” asked Pam.

“He has a class, he will be back when he is through,” I said. “Minnie and Aolani should be here anytime.” I called Jessica. “Jess, have you heard from Bill?”

“No, I haven’t,” she said. “I have had my hands full.”

“So I see,” I said. “Take your time, if Bill or Eric calls you, let me know.”

“Is he in trouble?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” I lied. I hung up. “So what are you going to do with our girl here?”

“I was hoping you and Aolani and Renee could do something with her,” said Pam. Suddenly Diantha Cataliades popped into the room, making Tara hiss like a cat. “Calm down Tara.”

“What the fuck is she?” she said, smelling towards Diantha.

“She is something you definitely don’t want to eat,” I said.

“Maybe I should eat you,” she growled.

“Pam I am going to bind your progeny if you don’t do anything with her,” I said. “Besides, I don’t want her growling and hissing at everyone.”

“You can bind her?” she asked. “What would she be like?”

“Quiet,” I said. “Frankly, that is all I can imagine we could do with her.”

“Bind her then,” said Pam. “I would not have brought her if I had someone to take care of her.”

“Fucking Sookie,” I said.

“You took the words out of my mouth,” said Pam.

“No, Lafayette has brought Sookie here,” I said. “I bind you Tara, against harming yourself and other people.” I spoke the spell three times and Tara was still, blank. “Pam snatch her up and take her into the one of the light tight rooms. I’ll go and get the door.”

Diantha popped out and Pam went with Vampire speed to grab Tara and put her in Bill’s quarters. I sprayed some air freshener around and went to the door. There was knocking on the door and I went and answered it, muttering the charm to guard my mind from Sookie. “Hey Lafayette, hey Sookie,” I said. They came in past me and looked around.

“They any Vampers up in here?” asked Lafayette.

“No,” I said. “How you all doing? Want something to drink?”

“We ain’t here on a social visit,” said Lafayette. “We are here about Tara Thornton.”

I sighed. “What about her?” I asked. “You got exactly what you wanted, Tara is extant.” You really could not say she was alive, but she was here.

“We need to do something with her, make her better,” said Lafayette.

“Pam warned you, Sookie told you Tara would not like this,” I said. About that time Alcide came in.

“What is he doing here?” said Lafayette.

“He is a friend of the House,” I said.

“I didn’t know you had company,” said Alcide. “I need to talk to Len.”

“He is not here,” I said. “Aolani and Minnie and Len are not here yet.”

“I need to talk to you,” he said.

“We got here first dog boy, so you will have to take a mother fuckin’ number,” said Lafayette.

“I can’t help you Lafayette. You and Sookie made the decision for Tara and you both know she would not like it, Pam did it for Eric, not for either of you.”

“You can though, you and your friends have influence with Eric Northman,” said Lafayette.

“That’s fine, I will just go to Bill,” said Sookie. I could feel her trying to press in on my mind.

“Keep out of my head Miss Stackhouse,” I said. She stood there. “Don’t give me that look.  And don’t get to feeling fae on me. Besides, why would you go to Bill, you told them goodbye, you...discarded them.”

“Great, just what I need, another fangb….” I turned around.

“Don’t you dare,” I said. “Like I said, I can’t help you.  Tara is Pam’s child now. You know Vampires well enough to know the magik that makes a Vampire rise can take out a huge part of their personality and change their world view. It may be that Tara might come to herself, on the other hand, she may stay the way she is and if Pam can’t get a reign on her, she may have to put Tara down.”

“Jessica didn’t turn out that way,” said Sookie.

“She came a gnat’s ass of being just that way and it was a concerted effort of everyone involved to help her turn out a little better than we expected,” I said. “Now, go home, you have bigger fish to fry, both of you.” Sookie gave Alcide a nasty look and she and Lafayette stomped out. I turned to the were. “Tell me.”

“She sure as shit has troubles, but then so do I. You saw what happened?” he asked.

“Yeah, but let’s wait for the others to get here, we will think this out together,” I said. Renee came in with a covered dish.

“What’s going on and what is that fucking smell?” she said.

“Fucking Tara Thornton,” I said. Renee wrinkled her nose and walked in.

“Hey there Alcide,” said Renee.

“Renee,” he said.

“You have a world of trouble going on huh?” said Renee.

“Yeah, apparently so,” he said. Renee took her covered dish in.

“I fixed that cheese and rice dish,” she said. Pam wandered out. She was alone. “ Congratulations!!! It’s a girl!”

“I hate funny humans,” she muttered.

“Good to see you too,” said Renee. She tucked the casserole in the oven to stay warm. “Aolani called me, she and Minnie and Len are running late.”

“That is fine,” I said. “I have to cook the chicken anyhow.”

Alcide and Renee sat there as I fried the chicken and put it on a plate covered with paper towels. Pam paced until I nearly entertained the thought to bind her as well.   I tossed a salad and everything was ready for when the rest came in. Finally Aolani and Minnie and Len came in. “Has anyone heard from Bill or the Champ?” asked Len. I laughed.

“No, and we are not likely to hear from them anytime soon,” I said. Diantha giggled at the new name Len gave Eric. Jessica came in.

“Have you heard from your daddy?” asked Diantha.

“No,” said Jessica. “Why do you all act as though Bill and Eric are in trouble?”

“Um, they are,” said Aolani.

“Jesus, what stinks beside the chicken?” asked Jessica.

“The newest member of the fang,” I said. Jessica looked around.

“Did Bill make someone?” asked Jessica.

“No, Pam is the maker,” I said. “Let’s eat and then chat.”

After supper, we put the dishes into the dishwasher and we went and sat in the living room. Alcide was vibrating with anxiety. Aolani called our meeting to order.

“What is the story with Bill and Eric?” asked Jessica. I looked around and waited for someone else to speak. I really didn’t want be the one to tell her.

“They are in a spot of bother,” said Barrister, coming in, sitting his bag down.  He leaned down and kissed me and sat down beside me. “But you seem to have troubles of your own.”

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“Steve Newlin?” said Minnie. “You need to be real careful with Steve Newlin.”

“I have this,” she said.

“Just saying Jessica, be careful,” I said. “But back to Bill and Eric.”

“Can you do anything for them?” she asked.

“No, and you know that Pam,” said Renee. “They have to work all this out on their own.” Though Renee said this, you could tell she did not like this in the least. She wanted Bill to get out of this. Of course I did too, but this was an area we could not delve into.

“So what do you know about this Authority Pam?” asked Barrister.

“I know that once you get arrested by the Authority…they aren’t inviting you in for tea and crumpets,” said Pam. We looked around and said nothing. Eric kept secrets even from Pam. She did not know Eric’s close contact was an authority member not to mention his Vampire sister. I sighed over the fact that some humans would interpret this as a familial relationship like humans and whisper about incest. It simply didn’t work this way in the Vampire world. I mean, if they want to get technical, Eric and Pam are father and daughter and he has an affair with her too.

“Can any of you help me with my situation?” asked Alcide.

“What the fuck Alcide, the wolves ate their pack master and you did not seem that shocked,” said Renee.

“No, that is the way some packs deal with the situation before a new pack master steps in,” said Alcide.

“Gross,” said Minnie, wrinkling her nose. “So are you the pack master?”

“Yeah, by all our rules, when I killed Marcus, I became the new pack master, but I will be challenged.”

“By whom?” I asked.

“Can’t tell yet,” he said.

“Will Sam be in this mess?” asked Aolani.

“Very likely, but I will try to keep him out. What with being tangled up with Bozman’s ex and the little girl, he is in this pretty deep,” said Alcide.

“So where is Jesus?” asked Minnie.

“I don’t know,” I said. “The dead are powerful and they call out to their blood at the end. Could be his grandfather came and got him.”

“I had not thought of that,” said Aolani.

“Well, we have tons to think of,” said Barrister.

“So, what are you going to do with Tara?” she asked Pam.

“Aslinn put a binding spell on her,” said the Vampiress.

“That will go away when she leaves here,” said Aolani.

“Then I will leave her here while I take care of Fangtasia and wait for Eric to come back,” she said.

“Nope, Tara is your baby, you have to rock her,” said Renee. Pam looked at her. “Hey, she is your child. You have to train her, teach her and take care of her. You and Eric did this to Bill when he had to turn Jessica, you were asked to care for her and you taught her a bunch of bad habits and dumped her back on him. He had to step up for Jessica. Now you do too, Pam. Nobody told you to do this, nobody forced you to like they did Bill. You decided to do this, now you have to raise her.”

“We aren’t equipped to deal with her,” said Aolani. “You will have to do your best with her, either that or give her the True Death and put her out of her misery.”

“I did this for Eric, I thought if I helped Sookie he would see this as a peace offering and take me back.”

“He isn’t against you Pam, he is just in deep shit,” I said. “And Russell Edgington is alive. Not giving him the True Death was a bad deal all the way around. Poorly played on Bill’s and Eric’s part.”

“Tara!!! We are going,” she called. Tara came out, subdued physically but mentally, her cheese had slid off its cracker. “Call me if you hear from Eric or Bill.”

“You will be the first to know,” said Aolani.

A New Counselor

Renee hands Eric a fresh deck of cards as we settle to play poker. It is the first gathering of the House since we had vanquished Dracula and this Sunday we would be starting the new adventures. These adventures we would have no part in, just as observers and I had to say, I was worried about all our fave neighbors in Bon Temps. I even wondered about Tara? What was going to happen to her, except maybe some sort of…resurrection? Who knows? The teasers were right; nothing stays buried in Bon Temps.

Bill was sitting at the table already, with his chips in front of him and Barrister gave me a stack of $1.00 bills to put with the hundred dollars I usually allot myself to lose to the Big Viking. Minnie brought Eric a warm Tru:Blood and he kissed her and sat down at the table and began to shuffle the cards faster than any human could. “From the top Eric,” said Renee, sitting her margarita on the coaster marked with the Fangtasia logo. I had a bottle of Guinness on a coaster myself.

Aolani and Jessica were watching the fun. Finally Eric began to deal the cards. We picked our up our cards and held our expressions in their patented poker faces. Eric picked up his cards and immediately laughed. “Renee dearest, these cards are filthy,” he said, turning cards one way and then another to look at the pictures. Bill gave her a disapproving look. Well, he tried and did not succeed. She stuck her tongue out at him and he smiled his sweet shy smile.

“Just a wee something for you in advance of the new adventures,” she said, picking up her cards. Now we would not know if the looks of surprise would be over the quality of the cards or the filthy pictures on them. Jessica looked over my shoulder and gasped.
“Oh my god,” she said, putting her manicured fingers to her shocked mouth. “That is filthy.”
“Jessica,” said Bill.
“Okay daddy,” she said, sulky. Bill looked up at her and she smiled. He smiled back. I liked the way they interacted now; they were bonding as maker and child. It was not only good for Jessica, it was also good for Bill.

“What time can we expect our visitor?” asked Bill to my Barrister.
“Any time, he promised she would knock and not just appear,” said Barrister.
“Who is coming?” asked Len.
“Someone we want you to meet, in case you are unable to contact us, you will have someone here to help you,” said Eric.
“Another Were?” asked Minnie, as Eric pulled her onto his lap.
“No, just a friend,” said Eric. “How much do you think I should bet?” Minnie leaned forward to look at his hand, to sneak a closer look at the pictures, I am sure.
“I don’t know Eric, I don’t know about poker,” she said, still staring and blushing at the same time.
“See any cards you like dearest,” he asked.
“Um….how about this one,” she said…pointing at the card in the middle of his hand.
“Excellent choice,” he said. “I bet 5.” We all put in our first bids and choose the cards we want to discard. Eric begins to pass out the cards to us. I shrug a little. Great little orgy but a terrible hand. I sighed. Eric was going to win all my money. We got through another round of bets and we began to bluff. Bill seemed pretty confident, but then it is always hard to figure out the faces of Vampires. They are inscrutable. “I call.”

We laid out our hands. I had a pair….well if you counted all the tits and other paired up bits, you had waaay more than a pair, but that was neither here nor there. To my surprise, Bill won this hand. He scooped up the chips and money and smiled, pleased with himself. He lifted a card and winked at me and I stuck my tongue out at him. My thigh still ached from the cramp I got in that position.

Bill gathered up the cards and began to shuffle them, again, his hands a blur. Jessica perched on the edge of the chair Renee was sitting in. Bill began to deal the cards. About the time Aolani came up with a slice of cake, there was a knock at the door. “Don’t bother Aolani, I will get it.” Alcide got up and went to the door, looking out the peep hole. “It’s a strange looking girl; at least she looks like a girl.”
“How is she dressed?” asked Pam.
“Tank top over a…plastic see through skirt and a pair of pink and black leggings and combat boots. Her hair is pink too,” said Alcide.
“That would be our guest,” said Barrister. Alcide unlocked the heavy steel door and slid it back to admit the stranger. It was Diantha Cataliades.

Of course we all knew about Diantha, the niece of Desmond Cataliades. She was a half demon. Not a go to hell demon with horns and a bifurcated tail, but a magikal creature, like her uncle. She came in, bouncing like she was dancing to a song only she could hear. “Hey,” she said.
“Welcome Diantha,” said Bill. “Thank you for coming.”
“You didn’t tell me your friends were witches,” she said, looking at those of us who were practicing the craft.
“Do you have something against witches?” asked Aolani.
“No, I just didn’t know,” she said. You had to pay attention to what Diantha said, not because it was uber important, but because she talked justlikethis and you had to let your mind sort out the words so you understood her. Listening to her was like listening to a speed reader read a teletype machine aloud.
“So, why do we have to have a demon among us?” asked Alcide.
“Do you really have to ask that?” said Eric. “Bill and I will be away and you have your own troubles. I don’t want our friends to have to deal with any problems without help. Who would you have suggested? Lafayette?” Pam snickered. She had a twisted sense of proportion when it came to Lafayette. She would rather aggravate him than drink blood.

“I think introductions are in order,” said Barrister. “Diantha, you already know me, but let me introduce you to my lovely wife and Bill Compton’s sister wife, Aslinn. Of course you know Bill, on his right is his second sister wife and her name is Renee. The lady being dandled on Eric’s knee is Minnie.” Minnie waved at her and smiled. “Don’t mistake her as a wall flower, she is a dead shot.” Diantha smiled and displayed teeth that really didn’t look quite like human teeth but not exactly animal teeth. “The young woman standing behind Eric is his second sister wife, Aolani.”
“Hey,” she said.
“You may not know the lovely Jessica Hamby, and I am her human companion. The gentleman with Pam is Len. Len is also married to Aolani. And last but not the very least, Alcide Herveaux, the future pack master of Shreveport.” Barrister ended his introduction. Diantha looked around at all of us. Alcide sighed and looked away. I thought Barrister was counting his chickens before they hatch.
“Two weres?” she asked.
“Yes,” said Barrister.
“And three Witches…no four…but who is the fourth?” she asked.
“I am,” said Jessica. “Well, I am trying to be.”
“Try nothing, you are dedicated first year witch, and pretty talented,” said Aolani, fondly. We never expected Jessica would actually learn magik. There were some things that were difficult for her in magik, and truthfully in life and love, but we were working on a lot of things for her to help her advance in her studies.
“That is so cool,” said the demoness. “So what do you all expect to happen this summer that requires me joining your little group?”
“We should sit down in the parlor, chat about this in more comfortable surroundings. “ Eric stood up to show off his impressive height, handing Minnie off his lap and without letting go of her hand, grabbed Aolani’s hand and walked them over to one of the huge couches.
“Diantha, would you like something to drink?” asked Renee. “We made some iced coffees with Bailey’s Irish Cream.”
“Sure, and can you spike it with a shot of Tru:Blood and a lime?” she asked. Renee made a face.
“Are you sure?” she asked.
“Of course I am,” she said.
“Bring me the rest of the bottle, for Jessica,” said Bill. We were still forcing Jessica to pound down a Tru: Blood from time to time. She got most of her nutrition from humans, but so long as we got to get her to drink one or two while she was here, we hoped this would stave off her hunger a little and prevent any unfortunate accidents. Renee went off to make the concoction for Diantha.

Finally she brought the drink to Diantha in a tall Irish Coffee cup and she settled by Bill.
“We asked you here Diantha to help our friends deal with what will be happening to us this summer. Bill and I have to be away, and we know things they will see will trouble them. See, the guiding light of True Blood Anonymous is helping our human friends cope with what they will see happen to us, because in these stories, they cannot help us, not really,” said Eric.
“So I am like a counselor?” asked Diantha.
“Funny you should say that, because that is exactly what we thought of ourselves so long ago,” said Bill. “Now we are out in the open.”
“So what do you all expect to happen this summer?” asked Diantha.
“Well, these are really just speculations, but this is what we suspect will happen,” began Eric.