Meeting of January 13

La Famiglia (The Family)


Red Headed Harlot and I were setting up the treats, silent, wondering about our Westexan and the Kaiser. God Speed was laying out treats, little bagel pizzas and mini CB's and Linzy made us some Hard Lemonade. Mel and Liz came in, Mel laden with cinnamon rolls as large as a Viking Vampire's gracious plenty. Dude and Sal came in with Butter and Fairy.

"Have any of you heard anything about Westexan?" asked Sal.
"Nothing yet," said God Speed. Lina came in and sat down her coat and purse and came over and got into the cabinets and pulled out cups and plates and plastic silverware (I love using my favorite oxymoron) along with napkins.

"Has everyone seen the new promo yet?" asked Lina.
"The back in production promo?" asked Dude.
"That would be the one," she answered.
"Only on the net, I haven't seen it on the TV yet," said Dude. That was where I had seen it. I was excited now more than ever. It was just enough to get our blood going, especially with the revelation that there would be a fourth summer of adventures. Had it really been almost two years that we had become addicted? Of course there were some who had been strung out on B long before the adventures began, but junkies are junkies and this drug was so deliciously addictive. Delicious, like a tea cup human to the Sheriff of Area Five. That made me think again of our Westexan.

Violet and Minnie Mouse came in and sat their things in their chairs, carefully preserving the place our Westexan sat. We could feel her absence, as though one of our nest mates had gone missing. Maybe that is how we really felt about each other on the forum, "virtual" nest mates, all cozy in our internet lair from where we watched the world with our counselors at our backs, shadowed figures that we trusted without knowing why. I shook my head from such thoughts. Surely this was a sign of just how deeply addicted we were, not just to B or TB, but to one another's shared addictions, only we really understood each other. Renee, Violet, Bella and I understood our love and admiration for Bill. Linzy, Lina, Burke and Fairy had their allegiances to Eric. Sal, Dude and God Speed were under the spell of Jessica and we all loved the rest in between. Even the villains were wonderful and we loved them too, even if what we really loved was to hate them.

We began to settle finally, Mikeylikesit rounding out the circle and it was not much longer til the lights went out except for the ambient lighting of the four little track lights that now shined down our little circle. The lead counselor, tall and mysterious in his shadow, where I liked him the most, was standing leaned against the door. My counselor, the one I shared with Renee, Violet, and Bella was sitting in his chair, his arms relaxed on the arms of the chair and his legs crossed. I could hear the young counselor whispering sotto voce to the lady counselor, asked her where Westexan was.

"Yes, has anyone heard from Westexan? Has she safely delivered her child?" asked the lead counselor.
"We don't know yet," said GS. "Aslinn has not heard from her yet."
"Even a safe delivery would be taxing on her," mentioned the southern counselor in his soft voice. "But, when you hear from her, please pass on our best wishes, won't you sweetheart?"
"I will, I am sure she will let us know soon," I said.

"What shall we talk about tonight?" asked the lady counselor.
I slid down into the comfortable chair and sipped my lemonade and bit into my bagel bite. Red Headed Harlot spoke first.
"Do you think we will find out about Sookie's other family?" she asked. "This summer, I mean, though it is so early."
"The first season was about love, finding love. Sookie is looking for it, Bill found it though he might not have been looking for it. Maudette was looking for love in all the wrong places," said GS. He was interrupted by Dude crooning "Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places" We all laughed.

"Well, Jason too and Sam and Tara, and Amy....Sometimes, love hurts...." said Liz. I opened my mouth and Liz gave me a look. "I know, I know, don't start Aslinn." I stuck my tongue out at her. :P

"And then, last season was about being held against one's will, and everyone was at one time or another trapped," continued God Speed. "Bill, Eric, Sam, Tara, Eggs, Sookie, the entire town of Bon Temps."
"Godric," I mentioned. We were silent for a moment, remembering the beautiful and savage Godric who's reborn humanity was too painful for him to live with. "So, this season is all about Family, finding family, defining family, loving and hating family.....This is going to be so tough."
"How so Aslinn?" asked the lead counselor. I saw Violet readying her box of kleenex. I didn't know if I was about to cry, but I leaned forward and made a come on motion to Vi for a handful.
"Family...is the most complicated social group you could belong to," I began. "You can love them, marry them or make some meaningful relationship with someone, have children." Again our minds went to our absent Westexan. "You can be a sibling or a parent and adult child, lovers and best friends, but there are a subtleties in the family. Like little things you say out loud and things you keep to yourself. Emotions you hold in check because they are so fierce that if they escaped, they would burn you up. Even the good emotions, all the love and passion."
"Like in making love?" asked the young counselor.
"Like in making love, sure, but even platonic relationships. You can love someone fiercely and it not have anything to do with sex, it transcends physical love. That is what sometimes makes it hard to be in family," I said. "Look at Tara and her mother. That is the most intense love/hate relationship I have ever seen, and we have all had them." Everyone nodded in agreement.

"And everyone is going to be reunited with someone who is family, even Bill," said Sal.
"So, what would you do if you found out you were not the person you always thought you were, like Sookie," asked the southern counselor.
"Well, she doesn't have anyone to confront. The only person she could have gotten the answers from was her gran' and now she is dead," said Lina. "Poor Eric, though, he doesn't have a family. His family died a long time ago and now Godric...." I handed her half my wad of tissues as she choked up a little over her Big Viking.
"That doesn't mean he can't explore something of his own self. Some people go all their lives without benefit of family and they find comfort or self by exploring the world. Perhaps exploring his lost humanity will be like a homecoming for Eric," said Dude thoughtfully. "Maybe Sookie will help him do that."

"But family means betrayal sometimes," said the lead counselor. The southern counselor looked up at him but the lead counselor did not acknowledge him.
"Sure, I mean, again, look at Tara and Lettie Mae," said Mel.
"And Bill and Sookie," I said. "That is what we are thinking right? That Bill betrays the seed of a family he trying to make with Sookie by asking her to marry him and goes back however briefly with his maker...at least in the Connection's world...in the Source's world, it may not be be quite like that."
"And then Sookie betrays Bill," said Bella.
"Not really," said Red Headed Harlot."I think that Sookie turns to Eric out of pain and desire...lots of desire, sure, why wouldn't she? But part of it is pain, and if the Source makes Eric as he was in the Connection's world, then she finds something sweet and gentle in him. Of course he is still a Vampire and lethal and all that, but there is something sweet about him that might in someways remind her of Bill. There is a lot of healing that goes on between people who are alone. And just then, there weren't two lonelier people in the world than Eric and Sookie. She even said it herself, that Eric had gained something that night, he had gained her, and in a way, she had gained her feeling of being loved."

"And then he forgets," said God Speed.
"But then....he remembers, he remembers everything, and he remembers most of all that he was happy," said Linzy, finally.
"Family." I said it aloud, unbeknown to me til I realized everyone was waiting for me to finish. "It doesn't matter how much you kick and scratch and gouge and spit and fight among family, you still are, at the end of the day, family. And family, sometimes, is the safest place to be."

We broke up the meeting not long after that and went our own way. The last one out was the lead counselor. He stopped for a moment at Westexan's chair and put his hand on it. His went up and pulled the Thor's Hammer out of his shirt and fingered it. He looked up at the ceiling and saw past the ceiling to the black sky. He stood there silently for a moment and closed his eyes. Was the lead counselor praying? Could he remember how? Even so, the light from the small lamp shown on his fair features, making his hair shine like spun gold. Whether the Viking remembered his prayers or not, I could not say, but after a moment, he opened his eyes and left the empty meeting room, turning off the last of the lights as he shut the door.