Your Own Personal Jesus

They want you to play Jesus
They’ll go down on one knee
They’ll want their money back
If you’re alive at 33
Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me- U2

Aolani and Minnie were standing on the stoop of the house, about to go in when they saw Eric. He stopped there in the middle of the street, the sun shining on his white face and making the red blood look over bright and unreal. “Eric, come in,” said Minnie. He shook his head and sped away. They came into the house. I was at the computer, working on the forum, muttering at how slow the internet was.

“What should we do Aolani?” asked Minnie.
“I don’t think there is anything we can do,” said Aolani.
“Did he whiz by?” I asked.
“Yeah,” said Minnie, downhearted. “I wished we could have gotten him to come in.”
“Does this mean they are now permanently daywalkers?” asked Len. I shrugged.
“Bill has been doing it a while, but I don’t know if it ever wears off,” I said. “Maybe.” The phone rang. Barrister answered the phone.
“It’s Sookie,” he said. I took the phone.
“What?” I asked.
“Well that was abrupt,” she said.
“You want a friendly hello, call the local time, otherwise, we are a little busy here,” I said.
“I have to talk to someone, someone who knows what is going on,” she said.
“Come on over,” I said. “I don’t know what we can tell you, but come on over.” I hung up. Renee looked at me.
“Don’t know why you are inviting her over for,” she said.
“I don’t know either,” I said. “I don’t know what is going on, I don’t know what we can do to help.”

An hour later, there was a knock. Barrister went to the door and opened it. “Come in.” Sookie came in and looked around at the steampunk inspired room. Minnie had made brownies, no not her famous special brownies, but regular yummy gooey chocolate richness. There was coffee and tea made. Barrister helped Sookie with her jacket and took her purse and hung them on the hanger. “Won’t you sit down?”
“So, Eric did all this?” she asked. I guess she was trying to understand that the same person who had gone to cemefaerie had cleaned and restored her house and had built this place for us.
“Yeah, Eric did this,” I said. “Coffee?” She nodded and I poured her a cup. “Crème? Sugar?” She nodded and I added a dollop of Devonshire Crème and put a couple of packets of sugar in her cup and stirred it. I grabbed a plate with a brownie on it and took it to her. I went back and we got our cups and returned to talk to the telepath. “What can we do for you Sookie?”
“I don’t know, I guess I just need to talk to someone who knows what is going on,” she said. “I am sort of lost.”
“About what?” asked Aolani.
“I have this decision to make and I don’t know how to make it,” she said. “You know about Warlow, right?”
“Yeah,” said Len.
“What would you guys do?” asked Sookie.
“I would do whatever it took to save Eric,” said Minnie. And this is something we knew was true.
“Or to help Bill,” said Renee. And this too, we knew was true.
“So you guys would be a Vampire?” asked Sookie. I looked at her and sipped my coffee. I lit a cigarette.
“Sure,” I said. “Being a Vampire is not a bad thing to be.”
“Do you think it is a bad thing to be?” asked Barrister.

“I don’t know,” she said. “You know, I hate being what I am, I hate being a telepath, I hate knowing what people are thinking. I wished everyone knew your spell or whatever so I didn’t have to hear what people think. I hate being different.”
“Well, I am sure it is tough being what you are,” I said.
“Don’t you wish you were normal?” she asked.
“I am normal…well, as normal as I am ever going to be,” I said. “I am what I am, and I accept everything about myself, even the weird parts of myself.”
“Would you be a Vampire?” she asked.
“I would. I don’t think there is anything wrong with being a Vampire. Vampire is just another sort of person,” I said. “You just have to decide what sort of Vampire you want to be.”
“Do you think being a Vampire is bad?” asked Len.
“The Vampires I have known have been so …dishonest…with me,” she said. “Bill, Eric, Russell Edgington, they are all monsters.”
“Warlow?” I added. “And yet, you seem to like to have sex with them. Is it only because you can’t hear their heads?” Sookie sipped her coffee.
“Probably, that is part of it,” she said.

“How can you have sex with something you think is intrinsically wrong?” asked Renee. Sookie shrugged.
“And do you care anything for them? Bill, Eric, Pam, Tara, Jessica?” asked Aolani.
“I don’t know,” she said.
“You know, these Vampires, especially Bill and Eric, have done things to save you,” said Minnie. “Bill walked into the sun for you a long time ago, remember?”
“I do,” she said. “Back when I thought he really loved me.”
“Had Bill not loved you, if he was only after your gift, he would have stayed right there and let you fight your own way out,” said Minnie.
“And Eric protected you. He offered his life for yours when he was chained to an altar,” said Aolani. “And he believed in you, he knew you would come back and he saved your house and then gave it back.”
“If they didn’t care about you, they would have never been there and saved you and believed in you,” said Barrister.
“And Tara has been your friend for years, as damaged as she is, and she has been Jason’s friend. She loved him for so long,” said Renee. “They are in deep trouble.”

“How bad?” she said. “Really, how serious is this?”
“It is serious,” I said. “They could die. And then how would feel?”
“What about Warlow?” asked Sookie.
“What is he to you?” I asked. “Is he anything to you? He says he has loved you for six thousand years but does he really love you or the idea of you? The idea there is someone set aside for him.” Sookie shook her head. “Sookie, ask him about Niall.”
“What about Niall?” she asked.
“Ask him about Niall?” I said. “That is all I can tell you. But think of this, if you help Bill and Eric, they will not just let Warlow take you away against your will. Bill is mad, but really, he is not mad at you. Eric hit a nerve with Bill concerning you, and Bill hit one right back. Not saying that was right or a good thing, but when you play Jesus, you must make a sacrifice and if you don’t, then everyone doubts you and you lose faith, even in yourself.” I looked at her. “You were the one thing Bill would not sacrifice just to salve Eric’s grief.”

“Bill is not god,” she said.
“No, he is not god, but there are martyrs everywhere, so ask yourself: is it really worth his sacrifice to you?” asked Aolani. “Could you live in a world without him? Or Eric?”
“This isn’t fair,” she said.
“Who says life is fair?” I said.